[Mahoushou☆Ghost] Nerdist: Car Tunes and Cartoons (2014)

I was asked by Meishi Smile sometime around the summer of 2014 if I wanted to do the accompanying illustration for their Nerdist mix+interview.  At that time I was dealing with a lot of anxiety, stress, & a break-up on top of all that, but I agreed because a lot of the interview goes into a lot of things that hit home.  

Zoom Lens symbolically represents that inner conflict found through the process of creating art and just simply being human…

I feel like Zoom Lens comes from a place in the heart that many would rather wish to conceal, yet I hope this mix helps represent the desire to break free and to embrace both positive and negative feelings as to turn them into something tangible and progressive to the self and to push the idea of art. It’s feelings like that which the label holds dear and I hope that it may even inspire you to open up as well as you listen.

The illustration itself is very harsh & not polished, but I feel creating the image under the condition I was in was important because those human emotions transferred into a tangible end product.   When I made this illustration, it was still a very confusing time for me, and I didn’t know how to process a lot of emotions I was feeling because they were all over the place that I did end up hiding them most of the time & not talking much to many people.  

Mahoushou☆Ghosthas always been for darker exploration of feelings, and I made it as a separate project from Thymine because I had a lot of feelings I never felt comfortable sharing with others, even those close to me for fear of being judged or lumped into being seen as weak.  I wanted it separate from the cheerful colorful illustrations I think most people associate with me.  For awhile, I didn’t even want Mahoushou☆Ghost to be traced back to Thymine. 

It’s been months since I’ve done this illustration, or even looked at it.  I wasn’t even around when it was released either.  But, looking back on it, & listening to the mix itself, the same feelings are still there – the desire to try to come to terms with the positives and negatives in life & in ourselves, & to become more accepting of those feelings and even sharing them without fear. 

Also, thank you to Meishi Smile for the opportunity.

[::Link::]